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Tuesday, June 28, 2011

Whoops!

That was one LONG Gala, huh?


Nope, not really.  Truly?  I got down on myself and just didn't feel like writing or sharing.  Then, when I felt like writing again, my computer died, so I had to wait until it was replaced.  I did get a new computer about mid-June, but didn't feel like writing again.  Maybe I need my meds checked.


The Gala was fine.  I shouldn't have been so nervous.  I knew quite a few of the people there.  Unfortunately, not many of them were ones I just wanted to invite myself to sit down next to and join in a conversation, but I did know them.  Hi, hello, how you doin, how are the kids... That kind of thing.  Chris was a social butterfly for most of the night.  I rarely had a seat next to him.  He wasn't at our table too terribly often.  Off schmoozing.


Food was fine - I tried to make good choices.  But it was the beginning of the end for me.


May was a horrible month.  Horrible.  We started "maintenance" on May 2nd.  And on that day (which Chris couldn't come home until late) I came home to find our dog Dillon alert but unresponsive.  He looked at me but couldn't stand up.  Couldn't wag.  Didn't reach for the nearest stick.  Something was horribly wrong.  Of course, it was 5:30 right then.  All vets are closed.  I somehow managed to carry him inside (he's a big boy).  Long story short: Chris came home, we got Dilly to the vet for an emergency visit, she confirmed our fears, and we put him to sleep.  Just the start of the month.  That's the worst thing, really; it's just that not much good happened for the rest of the month.
Some good did happen.  On Mother's Day, we got new phones through AT&T.  Changed providers and everything.  Girls each got iPhones (3gs), Chris got an iPhone (4), and I got an Android.  Which I really liked at first.  But then it started freezing and doing weird things.  I've since traded it for the iPhone 4 and have loved that.
So we are officially an iPhone family.  Which works because we are becoming an Apple family.  I never thought I'd say that.
That's what my new computer is -an iMac.  I've loved it too.  Still on the learning curve, but it's getting easier every day.  Chris couldn't be without his MacBookPro or his iPad, and he's all integrated now.  My next big purchase will be an iPad for myself (am sure I'll share with the girls).
Feelings and emotions?  Am I annoyed with myself?  Yes.  I haven't lost any more weight at all.  I've been up and down since we started the maintenance AND round 2 of the hcg.  I am currently at 197.3.
Hopefully, if I start recording on here my food again, I'll hold myself more accountable.  
I do have one thing I'm proud of today (I am "starting over" again today - I tell myself that I need to just worry about today: one day or one morning/afternoon or even just one HOUR.  Then worry about the next one when it gets here).  I wanted a biscuit.  Got halfway to the freezer and told myself, "NO!  I do NOT want that biscuit!  I want to be GOOD."  Turned myself around and went to the fridge to put on my hcg cream and made myself coffee instead.  Now I am having cabbage soup for lunch.  I've been good today.  Morning done, now to worry about the afternoon.  (It's actually evenings I have troubles with - so I need to figure out something for then).    And I will.  I will.  I have a goal.  I want to lose down to 185 for my anniversary - which is July 21.  Chris will have just finished up the CAMT math conference at the Gaylord in Frisco/Plano (somewhere around there) and he wanted us to stay a night there because it is supposedly very cool.  I impulse bought two dresses without trying them on.  And they're not good.  Not horrible, but not something I'd be comfortable out in public in.  Okay, one of them I will prob never wear in public as its a halter dress, waistband right under boobs, fullish skirt - and I don't have the best back ever... I don't have the worst, but not the best either.  That one will just be for in the room unless I can find a cute shrug or jacket to go over it... Come to think of it, I may have just the perfect sweater... hmmmm.  And the other I'll most gladly wear - after I lose 10-15 pounds.  Right now the bodice of it just fits and is very tight.  I look stuffed into it.  The skirt is straighter but still flows and looks okay, but my pooch gets attention drawn to it - so, in a spanx thing, with 10-15 pounds gone, it'll look good.  BUT those conditions have to be met first.
My cabbage soup is calling me.  I am trying to scan a newspaper picture so I can post Chris's social butterfly self.  I don't know why the iMac won't recognize the scanner.  Maybe my techy hubby can help me later.


:)
Glad to be back...


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